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The Masters wrapped up from Augusta National yesterday and “Lefty” captured his third green jacket. Mickelson finished the final round 3 strokes ahead of second place and walked off the 18th green to share an emotional moment with his wife, Amy, who has been battling breast cancer since her unfortunate diagnosis 11 months ago. It was a positive moment for golf after a week surrounded by speculation on the return of the sports biggest star, Tiger Woods.

Perhaps garnering more attention than Tiger’s play was a controversial commercial run by Nike (above). The 30 second spot features a remorseful Tiger starring into the camera lens with the voice of his father, the late Earl Woods, seemingly speaking to him, saying, “I want to find out what your thinking was, I want to find out what your feelings are, and, did you learn anything?” The commercial has fueled debate over the internet with many fans suggesting Nike and Tiger are cashing in on his infidelity.

I can’t hate on Tiger for this one, the man’s already lost several sponsors and had no choice but to do whatever Nike asked of him. Plus, it was probably the shortest commercial shoot he’s ever done, just had to look into a camera for 30 seconds and pretend to be sad. He probably just thought of the scene in Top Gun where Maverick flies his F-14 through Iceman’s jet wash and both engines flame out, causing the aircraft to go into a flat spin that he just couldn’t recover from, in turn forcing he and wingman Goose to eject from their seats which of coarse shot Goose directly into the jettisoned cockpit canopy and killed him on impact, leaving Maverick with an overwhelming sense of guilt, stripping him of his aggressive, risk-taking nature and even leaving him with doubts of staying in the Navy at all (what did method-actors do before 1986?).

Nike, on the other hand, has some questions to answer… It sure seems like they’re using this whole controversy to pedal their shoes and t-shirt guns (and what’s the point, those suckers sell themselves). Things get even weirder when we came to find out Earl’s words weren’t even directed at Tiger when they were originally recorded. Hmm.

Check out Stephen Colbert’s thoughts below and let us know what you think about the PR stunt in the comments section!

Tiger Woods made his return to golf yesterday at the Masters and it couldn’t have gone much better for the blasian. He ended day one towards the top of the leader board and at this very moment he’s tied for third in the 96 man field. Not everything went so well for Tiger in his 16th appearance at Augusta though…

A pilot out of Genoa, Ohio was dragging insults behind his Cessna for all the players and gallery to see (above). Tiger brushed the incident off when asked about it, saying “I didn’t see it,” but someone did… this morning the FAA told the pilot he had to fly his monogamous, wise-cracking ass back to the Buckeye state. It’s unfortunate, I would have liked to see the “Who’s got the best stroke?” banner he had for tomorrow.

For months on end folks tirelessly questioned the whereabouts of Tiger Woods and offered millions for a snap shot of the world’s greatest golfer, but rumors were all we had to work with. Now he’s on a fuckin’ press tour… After an interview with the super-awkward Tom Rinaldi of ESPN last week, the PGA let us know that Tiger would attend his first press conference in four months on April 5th.

Arnold Palmer (love his drinks) had this to say:

“I suppose the best thing he could do would be open up and just let you guys [media] shoot at him”

That is the best thing Arny, except it was the best thing about 4 months ago… Didn’t Tiger learn anything from Hugh Grant? I just hope someone on the tour pulls this classic on him, then we can all move forward.

Tiger Woods is putting his ho’s and his problems behind him as he plans on re-entering competitive golf next month at the Masters.

“The Masters is where I won my first major and I view this tournament with great respect. After a long and necessary time away from the game, I feel like I’m ready to start my season at Augusta,” Woods said in a canned statement.

“The major championships have always been a special focus in my career and, as a professional, I think Augusta is where I need to be, even though it’s been a while since I last played.”

Woods has not missed the Masters since turning pro and luckily for golf fans this year won’t be an exception. The Masters is always a huge television draw, but now the entire world will be watching to see how fans react to Woods and how Tiger deals with the pressure.

Personally, I hope he wins that motherfucker just to spite the media and all of the haters out there. Love him or hate him, he’s still the best golfer in the world, by far.

(As it turned out, that Vanity Fair article unveiled very little of the “mystery” in Tiger’s life)

The crew at SportsBore wants to extend a big “congrats” to the world’s number one golfer and closet-slut, Tiger Woods, whom is reportedly out of sexual rehabilitation and back at his Orlando home getting into “golf shape” – a fitness level somewhere between couch potato and death.

(WARNING: adult content after the jump)

According to the AP Woods had been participating in family counseling in Arizona prior to returning home and has already been to the range working on his stroke (insert too-easy sex joke here):

Woods is back home after a week of family counseling in Arizona and is trying to get back into a routine that includes fitness and his first significant practice in 15 weeks, a person with knowledge of his schedule said Tuesday.

Woods returned to his home near Orlando on Saturday and has been hitting balls on the range at Isleworth, not far from where he ran his SUV into a fire hydrant and a tree in a middle-of-the-night accident on Nov. 27 that set off shocking revelations of infidelity.

This is the first step to Tiger’s return to the sport, and though there is still no clear timetable for the golf icon’s return fans have to be encouraged by the news.

And I don’t mean to beat a dead horse fellas, but seriously… golf shape? John Daly was a walking heart attack and could still shoot a 2-under whilst wooing the trashiest milf in the gallery…

Gatorade dropped Tiger as a sponsor yesterday, but that can keep us from fondly remembering when pranksters shelved these “Unfaithful” bottles in Denver-area grocery stores. There is a federal probe into the matter, not to save Tiger’s image (lost cause), but simply as an FDA safety precaution. Obviously if someone can successfully stock grocery stores with funny Gatorade bottles who knows what’s next… perhaps Michael Phelps hitting a bong on a Wheaties box?

Check out this Denver news station’s report on the Tiger Woods Gatorade bottles… I’d love to get my hands on one of these!

Tiger let it all hang out this morning and we want to know what you all think about what he had to say. Refreshing? Forgiven? Not enough? Too Much? Funny? Not funny? Gay? Confusing?

Get the comments rolling and don’t hold back… remember, we’re the HBO of sports blogs so you can write “motherfucker” all you want! That’s why we’re awesome!

This title would have worked a lot better for Jack Nicklaus (get it, the Golden Bear… hilarious right!?) But seriously, Tiger announced today, through a press release, that he is finally facing the music this Friday at 11:00am.

We’re not going to pontificate on what Tiger is going to say, but we all hope he’s honest and contrite. There is nothing more frustrating than seeing guys like Mark McGwire and A-Rod beating around the bush and not really admitting what they did. I hope Tiger faces his press conference like a real man and lays it all out there.

Reporter:   “Is it true you were unfaithful with 16 women?”

Tiger:   “No, I’ve banged at least 30 women who were not named Elin since I got married.”

Reporter:   “Did you ever partake in orgies as some of the women have alleged?”

Tiger:   “What happens in Vegas… but seriously, of course. If you were staying in a villa at the Bellagio and you were as famous and handsome as me, you’d have orgies all the time too, Bob. But you’re not, and you don’t.”

Reporter:   “How will this impact your tournament play?”

Tiger:   “Have you watched the last two tournaments? I could have won those tournaments with one arm, a rake and a hose in my bag. My personal issues aren’t going to help Phil Mickelson become a clutch player.”

Reporter:   “Did Elin strike you?”

Tiger:   “She bitch-slapped the shit out of me Bob, but I deserved it.”

I’m not banking on Tiger being that direct and honest, but let’s hope it’s not too far off. If I hear another sports celebrity dodging hard questions and reading a prepared speech I’m going to write a very unfriendly post about them! Very unfriendly!

Most self-respecting porn stars don’t use their given name. Now I realize the terms “self-respecting” and “porn stars” don’t usually go hand-in-hand, but bear with me because I’m heading toward a point.

The porn industry has a tried and true system that helps aspiring porn stars come up with on-camera nicknames. Stars like Jenna Jamison, Lexington Steele and Ron Jeremy (above) have all used the following method to come up with their on-camera names. It’s a simple formula that yields tremendous results:

Porn Star Name = Middle Name + Street You Grew Up On

Last night, while I was drinking Zima’s with my buddies, we started sharing our respective porn names with each other. We were laughing heartily when it hit me… what would Shaq’s porn name be? How about LeBron? Peyton Manning? etc, etc.

I started trying to come up with their names but the problem with pro athletes is there is no information about what street they grew up on. This left me with a huge dilema, so I had to call an audible and came up with the following formula for pro athlete porn names:

Porn Star Name = Middle Name + Head Coaches Last Name

So, to fulfill my own curiosity, and test this new formula, I created a list of some of the best athlete porn names using this new method. Needless to say, I was amazed by the results! So who’s your favorite? Do you like the formula? Am I missing any good ones out there?

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LeBron James “aka” Raymone Brown

Shaquille O’Neal “aka” Rashaun Brown

Peyton Manning “aka” Williams Caldwell

Derek Jeter “aka” Sanderson Girardi

Dwyane Wade “aka” Tyrone Spoelstra

Tiger Woods “aka” Tont Harmon

Brett Favre “aka” Lorenzo Childress

Maria Sharapova “aka” Yuryevna Landsdrop

Candace parker “aka” Nicole Gillom

Michelle Wie “aka” Sung Leadbetter

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Geoff Ogilvy has FINALLY given us what we want – His take on the Tiger Woods situation:

“Tiger should actually come out in public before, and not at a golf tournament. One, out of respect for all the other golfers, and two, to diffuse the circus part of it before he actually gets to a golf tournament. I don’t believe a lot of tournaments want all the tabloid media floating around.”

Well here is the Bore’s take on Ogilvy:

“Shut the hell up Geoff!”

One, no matter if Tiger makes a statement before or after a golf tournament, it will be like a zoo. This shouldn’t bother Tiger because every single time he plays it is like a zoo. And why would this bother you anyway Geoff? Is it because nobody will be following you? Nobody follows you anyway if Tiger is in the tournament. You have won exactly ONE major tournament to Tiger’s FOURTEEN. And the one you did win, Tiger didn’t make the cut because he hadn’t played golf since his father died. It is insulting to even think you should be allowed to have a golfing opinion about Tiger. And if you think tournaments don’t want that publicity and attention, why don’t you ask their sponsors.

And two, If you think he should do this “out of respect for all the other golfers”, maybe all of them should have enough respect for him to not talk on a personal subject they know nothing about.

PS Geoff, in the future if you want to be taken seriously, try not spelling your name like such a douche. J-E-F-F.