On Friday night, the BCS busting Broncos of Boise State shot themselves in the foot against Nevada. Actually, they may have shot their kicker in the foot before they had him attempt those last two field goals. For anyone who didn’t see, in a tied game with two seconds left, Boise kicker Kyle Brotzman missed a field goal attempt from the 10 yard line. Then in overtime, the same dope missed a game tying effort from the 8 yard line. Both times Boise was lined up exactly in the middle of the field. These misses were so incredible that it made us at the Bore believe that something else was at play here…
Conspiracy Theory #1: He actually DID make the first field goal.
I’ve watched the attempt multiple times now, and it looks to me like it actually might have gone between the uprights. At least it was very close right? When you look at the other angles of the kick… Oh wait, I still haven’t seen the kick from another angle. On a football field with dozens of cameras, and at least 3 different angles on every replay I ever see, why does ESPN only show the one from straight behind the goal posts? The attempt in overtime was a miss. I know that because I saw it from two angles, proving that it was missed.
So why would they call a made FG “No Good”? Because this was BCS and ESPN’s last chance out. Boise played TCU in a BCS bowl game last year. No one respected this game, and really, no one watched. If this were to happen again, millions of dollars would be lost for both parties. People have been whacked in the mob for far less. Tim Donaghy (the NBA ref) shaved points in meaningless games. Who knows how far up this might go.
Conspiracy Theory #2: The kicker was paid off
Seriously, both of these kicks were basically extra points. Middle of the field, 10 yard line, two attempts. Either someone paid him off or he is literally the most un-clutch athlete in sports. He fell apart worse than Greg Oden’s knees…and just like Oden, Boise’s season is OVER.
Whether or not he was actually paid off or had a total meltdown, I know that he is someone I would not want to be on a sinking boat with. He would either take the only lifeboat all for himself, or panic so badly that he would drown himself and bring you down with him. One way or another, you’re screwed.
Conspiracy Theory #3: Gordon Gee got to him
Earlier last week the Ohio State president (the University, not the actual state) called out Boise and TCU saying that they weren’t worthy of playing for the BCS title. Am I the only one who wonders why this was such big news? A lot of people have made that same argument… why take it seriously when a nerd who looks like he isn’t even manly enough to watch football highlights on TV makes the same lame argument? Perhaps ESPN saw an ugly, old, white, dork with glasses talking about football and thought it was John Clayton. Otherwise I can’t figure it out.
Heck, maybe it was Gordon Gee who paid of the kicker. He has the money to pull it off. Either way, in an interesting twist, Ohio State may now have to play TCU. Gee could end up looking pretty stupid in a few weeks if that is how it works out. Ugly and stupid isn’t a good look for anyone.